Saturday, September 14, 2013

Connection, Myths, Ordinary People, & Our Hearts


Truth.

There are no ordinary people. Period.

Why do any of us want to be ordinary anyway? Fit in?

Yesterday, I gave a speech/presentation/training on Connection ~ Being A Connector. Wowsa! It is the first time I have ever spoken in a group setting about my theory/passion regarding connection. Now I have spoken a lot about it one-on-one, but this was terrifying....what if they laughed OR worse...were bored.

Well, I am pretty animated, speaking with my hands, big arms, big voice, big smile....I was figuring at the worst, it would be an hour of comedy.

Oh...and they were filming it. Kill. Me. Now.

So, I am in a coffee shop a few weeks back, and my theory on connection comes up...which is why I even had the wild idea about using it in the presentation yesterday....I mean, it wasn't what the group putting it on were planning for or expecting....but this new "connection" said, you should talk about this idea of yours. Huh? Really? Nah.

Hmmmm.....

So I did.

I have another gig to talk about it again to a different group next month.

Hmmmm.....

I. Have. Lost. My. Mind.

Lost. It.

So, I am sitting here on this absolutely beautiful morning, wrapped up in a shawl, my third cup of coffee, on my deck, laptop, highlighters, books, journals, newspaper, food wrappers, converse, pens, sunglasses, and lip gloss surrounding me.....

Yeah...I am not sure about that lip gloss thing either; I am addicted to it. I can't wear lipstick. I like to look pretty for myself? Pick one. :))))

I digress....

So, I am sitting out here reading, writing, and highlighting (not in any particular order), and I am buried in shame, vulnerability, and wholeheartedness....and I am sighing (loudly) wondering if I am ever going to be able to get away from this stuff?! Why is it haunting me? Okay...it isn't haunting me (it just feels like it is), but it is unnerving me and rocking every area of my life. Read that as Every. Area. Of. My. Life.

Suddenly it hits me....maybe it was something that came out of my mouth yesterday....or something I read this morning, but suddenly I realize.....connection and shame/vulnerability are completely inter-connected. Completely.

Why don't we connect more, better, period? Yup....don't worry....it took me a minute too.

So when I saw the picture above, I said (to myself) that is it. That's it!!!!  Until we embrace the fact that there are no ordinary people (including us....especially US), and that we don't want to be "normal" anyway...and we start looking at people's hearts which is where you see their inner-amazingness...which is so often hidden by the guardedness, shame, stress, etc....well, we won't have true connection.

Hmmmm....

I believe we live in a world craving connection. We have a connection deficit.  In fact, the social media generation (young-ins (is that a word?)) are actually better connected than some of the rest of us...they are all "hooked" up, and are at least reaching out (I found myself defending teenagers yesterday...Yikes!). The truth is that we exchange business cards and digits, but are we exchanging our hearts? I just started shaking my head as I typed that...No...we are NOT.

Brene Brown writes that we cannot show others what we do not show ourselves...

*Ouch*

Nobody took my joy. I gave it away. Did you give yours?

You are not going to be able to truly connect and be a connector if you don't give a damn about people....and to give a damn about others, you first have to give a damn about yourself.

Let that sink in.

This morning I slipped on a pair of pants I haven't had on in three years. In fact, my wardrobe that has been hanging in my closet patiently waiting on me to take care of myself again, is now giddy as they see my eyes and hands headed towards them once again....after a long winter.

If we give everything we have, everything we are, without personal regard to ourselves or our own needs, we will wither and die...or blow up like a balloon, suddenly have major health issues, lose our joy, piss away our money, hibernate in a cave, lose relationships we treasure, lose the relationship we treasure with ourselves. A reservoir or a canal. How are you choosing to live your life??? Really ask the question.

Connection is all about heart. Connection starts with your own heart. Connection is the invisible red string of yarn that connects all of our hearts.

Yesterday as I criss-crossed the state, I had my entire iPod on shuffle. Suddenly Francesca Battistelli's Beautiful, Beautiful came on....and before I realized it, I was singing it at the top of my lungs. I hit reply...twice.  I was going to quote them, but here are all of the lyrics....


"Beautiful, Beautiful"

Don't know how it is you looked at me
and saw the person that I could be
Awakening my heart
Breaking throughout the dark
Suddenly your grace

Like sunlight burning at midnight
making my life something so
Beautiful, Beautiful
Mercy reaching to save me
All I need
you are so
Beautiful, Beautiful

Now there's a joy inside I can't contain
But even perfect days can end in rain
And though it's pouring down
I'll see you through clouds
Shining on my face

Like sunlight burning at midnight
making my life something so
Beautiful, Beautiful
Mercy reaching to save me
All I need
you are so
Beautiful, Beautiful

I have come undone
But I have just begun
Changing by your grace

Like sunlight burning at midnight
making my life something so
Beautiful, Beautiful
Mercy reaching to save me
All I need
you are so
Beautiful, Beautiful

Like sunlight burning at midnight
making my life something so
Beautiful, Beautiful
Mercy reaching to save me
All I need
you are so
Beautiful, Beautiful

"...Like sunlight burning at midnight making my life something so Beautiful, Beautiful..." There are no ordinary people...we are all amazing, we all have something amazing about us, in us. Believe that. Live that. Love that. About. Yourself. Then, then...you can find true connection with others....because you have truly connected who you ARE with the truest thing about you....your heart.

I love this life. It is so nice to be finding my joy again. I smile knowingly...it was with me all along...and if you have lost yours...know it is waiting for you giddy, awaiting your return...to yourself.
 
"Authenticity is having the courage to let others see you as you really are." ~ Charlie Efford

Sunshine Dreams to You ~ Today and Every Day! :)