Just when I believe I am getting a grip on my "new normal" someone says something to me that reminds me that I am both so much further down the road than I believe....and not even close....simultaneously.
I love you E.
It is the truest friends which hold the mirror up and remind you that you are wiser, better, stronger, more beautiful, etc. than you can find a way to believe on your own. Those kinds of friends are angels sent from God because only God sees you at your very best and most perfect All. The. Time....only he sees the progress you are making, the changes you are going through, the best of what you will become...Only he and hundreds of little angels he sends to you just at the right time. Like E tonight.
I am not who I was, and yet I am not yet who I will be.
The growing just never stops. Does it?
Today, I had the funniest moment. I was getting ready this morning, and suddenly I just busted out in giggles, tears flowing I was laughing so hard. I had suddenly realized that I was patting my make-up around my eyes. You know...the way we watched our grandmothers and mothers do...other women, older women. At one point had I started doing that?? Grief. Aging cracks me up.
My skin and resulting actions are not the only things changing, growing, maturing....well, one can dream. :)
I think one of the most amazing things to happen to me as I started writing again, and also in sharing my own aha moments, mistakes, wins, etc., was that so many say to me I love going through your stuff with you. Wow! I don't even like going through my stuff with me...not the mistakes that is....and then you realize that maybe there is more to something you are doing than what you originally thought, and then you look up, raise your eyebrows, tilt your head, shrug your shoulders, and say, "You might want to be a LITTLE more obvious." :)))
I think the bottom line is that whatever mistakes we make, whatever setbacks we hit, whatever lessons this life teaches us...we are not in it alone. Each of us has struggles, challenges, losses, and we are all walking down a long and winding path. It is a nice reminder that sharing our struggles with each other doesn't make us weaker, it makes us stronger.
I'm not who I was...a month ago, a year ago, a decade ago, two decades ago. I needed the reminder tonight that I have come a long way, and yet I have a long way to go because the doors and windows are still opening. I can stop and rest, or I can push on...
|"Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson|
Do you want a path or a trail? There is no right or wrong answer. There is only the action of making the choice or letting the choice make you and reacting to it. There is also the choice of respecting those whose choices are different from you. I don't know that I have always been good at that, but I am learning...still learning.
"How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you will have been all of these." ~ George Washington Carver
Sunshine Dreams to You ~ Today and Every Day! :)