Sometimes it is not the heartbreak that closes off our hearts, but the subsequent act of walling it off as a result of the heartbreak and in some grand effort to never feel pain again.
I feel my heart opening up again...it is slightly frightening, feels a little like butterflies are fluttering around in there, and is happening in waves like a giant tsunami thundering in again and again.
I am a girl who has not always listened to the "whispers of my heart"...in fact, I tend to ignore them and do whatever "I" want or whatever feels safer. I am a weenie. Plain and simple.
God is having the last laugh with me though, and I am desperately trying to find someone to blame for it. Lee and Andrea? John? My BBGs? The kids? Hmmmm.....so many to choose from....:))))
The fact of the matter is that I have no one to blame but God, and my stubborn...stubborn self.
The simply truth is that the act of following your instincts, your higher self, your God, your whatever....is the single most courageous act any of us can ever do. It is funny because I had a text message last night from a dear friend (who was fretting) who described something they were feeling as "...impossible to categorize, or define, and both amazing and terrifying at the same time...". I smiled and texted them back, "I think they call that love."
It has taken me a long time to quiet down the noise of my life, the noise in my head, and frankly the noise I surround myself with (because I am scared to death) so as to EVEN be able to hear the whispers of my heart. As I do...(and when the deafening sound of my knees knocking isn't distracting me)...I am strangely surprised by what I hear....
I think they call that...Love.
Happy Valentine's Day!
Sunshine Dreams to You ~ Today and Every Day! :)