I believe that when we are in certain moods, we attract others in that same mood. The law of magnets? Perhaps.
I am struggling with some things personally and professionally. There is no time for the nervous breakdown, meltdown, hide under the covers day (or days) I so richly (feel I) deserve. A lot of people count on me every day, and I am keenly aware of my responsibilities. Keenly.
That being said, I find it odd that I am surrounded (it seems) by others struggling. I see it on FB, Twitter, at work, in the bookstore. We are all attracting each other (magnets). I find myself working to encourage them even as I am working through my own issues, most of which I am doing in silence, alone...as I am so programmed to do.
I am not a martyr. I am not a martyr. I am not a martyr.
I hate that word, and I am working diligently to make sure I am not being one.
Which leads me to this...I am working with others to bring a documentary to Arkansas about women and our role in the media, politics, etc. As part of our efforts, we are being allowed to preview the film privately ahead of time. I did, and I am aghast. The surprise in that? I am aghast at myself. Just yesterday I facilitated two training sessions, and in both I used words that I should not have...not profanity. Words that were demeaning towards women...I used them as jokes, to lighten the mood, to laugh at myself, and I am sitting here today yelling at myself for being such an idiot. If I were Catholic, I would be in a confessional. That is just one example. The film is powerful. It will most definitely spur conversation. We need to have the conversations that will come from a diverse group of women (and hopefully men) watching the film. I don't believe we fully realize how hard we are on ourselves and each other. I really don't.
Women really need to stand up for each other. Instead we are harder on ourselves, on other women, than men ever thought about being toward us. Why should they or anyone (male of female) value us if we don't?! That isn't rhetorical.
I want to go on record as saying that I am too hard on people, but more than that...I am too hard on myself.
I am off in search of my mojo. If you need help finding yours, reach out to me, and we'll form a search party together. We have to look for the good in ourselves, in each other, and in this world. If we don't, we are simply perpetuating the negative, and I for one am sick to death of the negative.
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.
~ Martin Luther King, Jr.
Sunshine Dreams to You ~ Today and Every Day! :)