Saturday, December 3, 2011

What Drives Me?

I am in my office working.  It is Saturday.  What drives me?

Now, don't feel sorry for me.  I slept in until 8 a.m.  I had no less than three cups of coffee while snuggled up in my warm, comfy bed playing with Pinterest and listening to Adele.  I then had brunch with Granny Dee, Uncle Odale, Miss Rosemary and Dad...and it was full of Dad's amazing breakfast (some of my best childhood memories with him reside around early mornings at our farm when he and I were the only two in the house awake and he made us breakfast) and a ton of laughter.  I secretly recorded most of it. ;)

Now, I have just finished popping off a few calls and e-mails that by some might appear I am trying to torpedo my career.  BTW - I'm not.  I am simply trying to kindly yet firmly deal with some issues that are building up in my professional life. 

In the midst of all of that, I am also tweaking my "Passion Presentation" for yet another group.  I continue to be bewildered when I get asked to come to someone's company, group, etc., and give this presentation.  It seems to be spreading and growing wings of its own. :)

So, while I am tweaking my PowerPoint and typing up fresh Note Pages on it, I can't help but ask myself the question...."What drives ME?"

Has it changed?

Hmmm.....

I had to revise my bio for Pinterest and then again for my presentation, and I sat and pondered if my old bio still described me.  Yup...I am still a woman trying to earn a living and create a path with my dreams, goals and passions.  And more importantly...I am still struggling to reside where earning a living and my passions collide.

*Sigh*

I am a big believer in being driven, but I am also a big believer in self-assessment.  I am not sure you can self-assess too much...at least I don't seem to be able to get enough of it. 

I believe if you are going to have the gumption to stand in front of a group of people and talk to them about discovering their passions in life and work, you better be doing it yourself in your own life. 

I also believe that it is important to be honest that even for someone who thinks and talks about this stuff (what seems like) all the time, it is difficult at times to LIVE it.  I lose my mojo (so to speak), and sometimes I even cause others to lose theirs (ugh...that is the WORST). 

I am a perfectionist, but what I am learning is that perfection cannot be what drives you....because if it does, it will KILL you.

I was interviewing someone recently for a job, and I handled the interview like I have handled a hundred interviews or interactions with someone who is not living up to their full potential.  Well, for the first time EVER, it didn't work out like I had intended...okay, truthfully, I failed.  I was devastated.  I'm still a little devastated by it.  Now, I could sell myself a bill of goods about how this person will wake up one day and thank me, but I have no way of knowing that...I have NO way of knowing that...at all.

What drives me?

I want to be better.  I want to inspire others to be better.  Every.  Day.

THAT is what drives me, and THAT is what is going to kill me.

Changing the world may start with just one step, but after awhile even Wonder Woman needs to stop to reflect and reload.

When I do hit pause...I am forced to admit that I fail sometimes.  I need to work to be okay with that.

Truth ~ I'm not there yet.

I am, shall we say, a work in process....and that makes me crazy.  Batty crazy.

:)

So what is the Glad Game for today??  Breath...I am glad that I still have breath because that means that God gave me another day to embrace the crazy. :) 

Breathe.  Embrace what drives you and what makes you crazy.  It all matters.  You matter.

For all of your failings...my failings, there is someone out there that is impacted by the life you lead...that I lead...Every. Day.  They are GLAD for YOU. :)

Sunshine Dreams to You ~ Today and Every Day! :) 

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